If you aren’t familiar with The Five Love Languages, I highly recommend you check it out.
It’s no exaggeration that this book/test literally changed my life. It made an immense difference in my family and helped us all feel more loved and valued by the other family members.
A brief synopsis: the book (or online test) helps you discover which of the 5 love languages you are (think like the love language version of enneagram). It explains that this is how you best recieve love, and often, how you express love to others.
Understanding different love languages identified in others helps you love them the way THEY feel loved.
For example: my love language is words of affirmation and my husbands is acts of service. My “go-to” whenever I want to express my love to him is to verbally share it, or write him a note. And while he appreciates these things, they are his heart language. It’s MORE meaningful for him whenever I DO something for him: do the dishes, take the trash out, wash his car, etc.
Again, not saying he doesn’t appreciate things in my native heart language… but it’s more meaningful whenever I can express things in his heart language .
So if you don’t know your love language, take this free test!
So, in this guide, I’m going to share a few ideas of how you can gift your loved ones intentionally, based on their love languages.
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
For the person who’s love language is words, then it is spoken or written words that truly fill up their heart tank. While it might seem hard to “gift” this to a person who loves words, worry not! It’s totally possible.
Write a handwritten love note. What might seem like a small gesture to you, will literally be something cherished and valued by this person. Never underestimate the power of a handwritten note to a person who’s love language is words of affirmation.
Ask the person’s closest friends to write letters to the giftee. You can either have them send them all separately (so an overflow of letters in the mail) or collect them all and give them in a bundle (in a binder or something, if you want to be organized).
Similarly, have friends send a short video sharing what they love about that person. Compile the video and have that person watch it. Bonus if you pull quotes from what each person said and list them out, for a “quick reference” guide on amazing things about that person.
Create a list of “25 Things I Love About You,” “25 Ways You’re Awesome” (or whatever applies to the person). Similar to the above, but if you don’t want to elicit the help of a bunch of other people, you can just create list on your own. Bonus points if you frame the list out.
Give them engraved jewelry. Have a meaningful word, name or date written on it so they can wear it and cherish it always. A few places I love to buy engraved jewelry from are here and here.
Gift them a journal you’ve filled out. I love the promptly journals, but you can also use something like this love letter prompt. Or if you really want minimal effort on your part, a journal like this gives you all the prompts!
ACTS OF SERVICE
For the person who’s love language is acts of service, they feel the most love whenever there is action behind it. So a great gift for someone with this love language is to DO something that shows your love and care for them!
Offer a coupon to babysit. If it’s for a spouse, gift them a night (or day) to go out and do whatever. Or stay home and you’ll take the kids out. Same thing for a friend, just offer this coupon (or several) to gift them some time.
Offer to cook a gourmet meal for them, or have them over for a meal, regularly! Acts of service just want the gesture of you’re doing something for them that they would normally do. But it doesn’t have to be complicated. I know my husband loves our Friday night homemade pizza nights – they’ve become a favorite tradition in our home.
Offer a voucher(s) of whatever would speak volumes to them. So whether that’s a voucher to clean their house, pick up the kids for a playdate, bring their favorite meal or coffee order, watch their pets, or all of the above!
Offer a fully planned vacation/travel plans! Even if you don’t pay for everything (depending on your budget), it would still speak volumes for you to be the detail keeper and plan everything in advance. If this person loves surprises, let everything be a surprise and just share the temperature range and days for them to know how best to pack!
Plan a staycation. For a little more budget friendly option (for all parties), simply plan a staycation! Create a full-days schedule of fun things to do in your area – it doesn’t have to be complicated! From offering to make them breakfast and fresh coffee (or bringing it, if cooking isn’t your thing), to walking around a local park, discovering a new shop, walking around downtown, etc. Staying local can be fun!
Pre-purchase a cleaning service. If you have a friend who doesn’t love to clean (and wouldn’t be offended by this gift), this is a great way to love on your friend and serve them… without actually having to clean their toilets yourself.
QUALITY TIME
The best gifts for a person who’s love language is quality time is an experience gift! They just want to spend time with their loved ones in a way that’s intentional and special, and what better way to create special memories than with an experience.Plan an adventure out with this person, doing things they love!
Gift them tickets to something you can frequent often: the movies, the zoo, aquarium, a theme park, a favorite national park, etc.
Book a fun class you can take together! Think: cooking class, jewelry making, learning how to letter, etc. AirBnb offers “experiences,” and you can look up things in your area, as well.
Book a spa day together, or better yet, create an at home spa experience! After all, they just want to enjoy doing the thing together.
Movie/Binge Marathon. If they’re an avid movie lover, or keep talking about a show they want to watch, offer a Saturday (or weekend) to binge watch/movie marathon! You can bring (or better yet bake together) the snacks!
Offer To Cook For Them (together). Speaking of snacks, plan a time to cook and experience meal together. Better yet, plan a time to get together every month to make it happen.
Board Games. If they’re a person who loves spending time with other people, getting a fun board game is a great way to get people together, while also honoring the “quality time” aspect. A few of my favorites are listed here.
“In Their Own Words” journal. This journal is special because it’s something that you don’t just give, but you actually fill out together. Here’s a link to one, and you’d essentially “interview” your mom with the prompts (great for quality time and a generational keepsake). Here’s the link.
Kitchen Keepsake Journal. This journal is a legacy/memory maker/keepsake, all in one. You write out recipes and then there’s a page that shares the memories associated with them. It’s great to capture favorite recipes from the past, and create new memories with ones in the future!
The Adventure Challenge. They have a book for couples, friends and family, and basically it gives you a list of adventures you have to complete with your designated people. Here’s a link.
GIFTS
For the person who’s love language is gifts, I’d say this is probably one of the easier languages to gift for because, well… they like gifts. As long as it’s something intentional that you know they would love or made you think of them, it’ll speak volumes to them.
Give them the gift of a subscription box! A person who loves gifts, will especially love something that is regularly sent to them. I mean, who wouldn’t want to receive something in the mail every month or every quarter? A few ideas for a good subscription are a coffee subscription, a mama subscription, a fave snack subscription, etc. Literally just google “______ subscription box” and the options will be endless! You can even find a gummy bear subscription box! So there are options for whatever their faves are! Here’s a site that has a whole bunch of different subscription boxes.
Make a digital scrapbook. Chances are if you’re gifting this person something, you likely have photos with them (or can snag some off their Instagram or Facebook) and make a memory album for them. Bonus points if you write out some memories to go with the photos, as well.
Dedicate a star in their name. Or you can buy a print with the day they were born (or another special date). Here’s a link to that.
Buy them a plant. If they are even remotely into plants, the beauty of gifting a plant is that they will see it every day and it will remind them of you! Plus this is a gift that they get to enjoy for the rest of forever (or, honestly, until it dies… but we’re not going to look too into that).
A subscription to their favorite magazine. I know in the past I’ve gifted Magnolia Journal to my sister and friends before, and it was always a hit! If you know a subscription they would love, this is a great gift to bless them with (and just send a card so they know it’s from you and not spam or credit card hack).
Buy an online membership to Skillshare. There’s thousands of creative classes, and this makes for an amazing gift. They can learn that skill they’ve always wanted to, or dabble in learning multiple things. Use this link to get a free two week trial!
Buy them a yearly membership to their fave. Whether that’s Disney+, Spotify, or whatever… Give them the gift that keeps on giving, aka, something they’ll use every. single. day.
PHYSICAL TOUCH
Physical touch love languages can seem hard to “gift,” but with a little creative thinking, it’s very doable! A person who loves physical touch likely loves frequent hugs, little love squeezes whenever you walk by, and any intentional way to be close.
Gift their favorite movie, with the promise of a night in watching it together, cozied under a blanket. Even if you aren’t dating the person, friends can still get cozy under a blanket together (you don’t have to actually be touching). Again, the purpose of this gift is just the closeness – having another person near you. And what better way to do that than watching a classic movie together!
Gift a cozy blanket. Better yet, give them a weighted blanket so they can always feel cozy, even when there isn’t anyone else to snuggle with. This one and this one have nearly thirteen thousands positive reviews!
Gift them some super soft and cozy pajamas. Don’t underestimate the power of touch, especially in something particularly cozy. A few options for you here, here, and here.
Gift them a massage oil set, or better yet, a trip to the spa for a massage! If you’re gifting for your partner, some massage oil (with promises or coupons for massages) are a great gift! If it’s for a friend or family member, a gift to the spa would be sooooo niceeee.
A trip to the roller skating rink (with lots of hand holding for balance). This is a memory filled gift, that will likely require lots of touching. Even if you gift it to a friend, you’ll both likely fall at some point (unless you’re a professional) and need to help each other up constantly. Bonus points for ending the day with hot cocoa.
Gift them TWISTER. If this isn’t the physical touch game of the century, then I don’t know what is. Just fair warning: if you gift it, you have to play it. This is a classic board game that will definitely make memories.
Gift them a yoga class (or a whole month of it). Yoga is a time where you connect with your body, and for a physical touch person, this could be the perfect gift! Depending on their personality you can gift them a regular yoga class, or do something fun like a hip hop yoga class or goat yoga!
I hope this list was helpful for you, and inspires you to think a little outside the box this holiday season!
I’d love to know – what’s YOUR love language? Is there anything you’d add to this list under your particular love language? If so, please share below!
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